The Birth Wars (Part 1)


Oh, I love, love, love being around pregnant women and the process of birth. It’s a subject that never gets old for me. I’ve been the labor nurse/birth assistant at hundreds of births and consider myself supremely lucky to go to work every day to do what makes me happy. So, I guess it makes sense that it would be a debate about birth that would be the precipitating factor to do something as out of character for me as starting a blog.

I’ll talk about birthing babies to anyone who’ll listen. We just met? Doesn’t matter. I’d love to hear your birth story (or your wife’s or partner’s or whatever), and don’t leave out any of the gory details; I’ve heard it or seen it before. Oh, and can I share my birth stories with you? Both of them? Each one was incredible in it’s own way. We can compare notes, and commiserate, and bond over such a life changing experience.

Except…..there’s a good chance that’s not what’s going to happen. Something about such a personal event makes us feel worried or defensive or militant when we come across someone who’s made a very different choice than we did…..and then begin the Birth Wars.

You know what I’m talking about. If you’ve had a baby you’ve probably had an uncomfortable conversion or two. There are blogs and message boards all over the internet where mostly moms, but sometimes others, fight tooth and nail about why their birth was better, smarter, and safer than yours. You got an epidural? Then you drugged your baby and missed a bonding opportunity which can’t be replaced. You had a home birth? The you put your desires and your fantasy birth scenario ahead of your baby’s safety.

Ugh.

We need to be kinder to our fellow parents and more open and accepting of different philosophies in general for ALL our sakes. In┬áthe interest of not writing a novel for each post I’ll wait until next time to tell you exactly what got me all riled up and in the meantime, leave a comment, follow or share this blog or better yet, tell me about your birth story. I promise not to judge.

The Start of a Revolution?


You know what the problem is with moderates? We tend to be quiet. Those at the opposite ends of an argument tend to be very passionate and vocal. Moderates? Not so much. We see both sides of the story and so we don’t tend to get so heated. We just wait things out and dismiss the radicals as radicals. You know what the problem is with that? The radicals get all of the airtime and start to sound not quite so radical.

So here I am, The Passionate Moderate. I am here to talk about being in the middle of polarizing subjects. I am here to be the voice of understanding and tolerance. I am here to give a voice to cooler heads.

So who am I?

A non-conservative living in one of the most conservative political counties in Texas.

A former Catholic, Unitarian Universalist in the bible belt.

A RN/midwifery student who absolutely appreciates obstetrical care while practicing in an out-of-hospital setting.

A vegetarian who cooks meat for her family every night……amongst other things.

So, have you characterized me as a flip-flopping, wussy, fence-sitter yet? Well, I am here to tell you that is not the case. I believe with all my heart and soul about the choices I’ve made for myself, and amazing as it may seem, I believe you have the right to make choices for yourself without my help. What frustrates me to no end are the people out there who want to make my decisions for me or tell me what kind of person I am based on the decisions I’ve already made.

Over the next few posts, I’ll tackle a number of divisive subjects, and I welcome all respectful comments and debate. No name calling or insults on either side will have a place on my blog. I’m here to encourage a civility that seems to be lacking in the current culture. Who’s with me?